My son...........

There are things that happen in your life that kind of wake you up to the reality that life is always moving forward. It always seems to be moving way to fast but this week I realized just how fast. My oldest son Dylan, joined the National Guard. This is an event that brings me both joy and sadness but not for the reasons most people would think.

Most of Dylan's early life wasn't easy, he was stuck with me, a single mother working two jobs most times and dragging him from one bad relationship to another. He spent more of his early years with my parents while I tried to support him since is father choose not to be an active participant in his life. Because of this in some ways he has grown old before his time. That all changed when I met Terry, we were married when Dylan was 14. Dylan gave me away at the wedding and then shortly after his 15th birthday Terry adopted him.

Dylan was always very interested in G.I. Joe's when he was growing up. His interest in the army only increased when Terry became involved in his life as Terry is a member of the National Guard. That brings us to March 9, 2010 when Dylan officially joined the National Guard. To me it was a day of joy as he is taking a step forward in his life and following in his great grandfather's, grandfather's and father's footsteps. I am proud he has chosen to take a step forward and protect this great county I call home, but I am also sad. I am sad because it means that he is about to start a new journey. A journey that will take him away from me and one step closer to being an adult, out in the world all by himself. A world where I go from seeing him every day to seeing him only when he has time for me. I am not ready for that. It seems like just yesterday I was bringing him home from the hospital and now he is going to be trained to work in one........

Time marches on, the alternative to that is death and although I would never wish death on my children I do wish that time would slow down a little and let me catch my breath, I haven't even developed our family pictures from 2009 and we are almost a quarter way through 2010. This summer my little boy now grown into a man will leave for basic training and come back to finish his senior year and then he will graduate and I haven't even had time to scrap book the last three years of his life.

I guess I should look on the other hand, I still have five kids left in the nest, one of which just got suspended from school for a week, but that is next weeks blog.

So Dylan, this is for you. From your mother who loves you even if she is a little neurotic I love you and I am proud of you and I know I have to start to let go. It isn't going to be easy for me to navigate into this next chapter of your life but I will do it. Love Mom.