Teenagers

I started this blog to share my trials and tribulations of living in a yours, mine, and ours household. It is a crazy, yet rewarding life, but to be honest I haven't really blog about it. Why, well because many of you may not find it interesting and the truth of the matter is a lot of my life is just plain boring, stressful and some days I just don't want to be a mother. Don't get me wrong, I love my children, ALL of them but some days it is hard not to want to send them off to the first available military school that will take them.

It is no secret in our home town that we hold our kids accountable for their actions, they don't get to run free. The have rules and limitations and no, they do not like it at all. I had one parent recently come up to me at a school function and ask "How do you get your kids to do their chores?" I answered in response "It isn't an option, if they don't do them there are consequences?" The other parent said "then aren't you just really punishing yourself, because my little Johnny would just not do it anyway."

To be clear, I was using chores as an example. For the most part my children are respectful, and hard working. We do not demand that they get straight A's. We expect them to be respectful to us and other adults. That they do there chores and help out when they see others in need. For the most part they do what we expect of them. If their grades are not good they lose their cars and their cell phones, and to be clear on this they have bought their own cars and they pay us monthly for their phones. I am hoping when they leave my house and wander into the big world around them that they realize they are not owed everything they want, that they have to work for it and that it is hard because nothing in life is every really free.

So here is our family rules, you may agree or not, you may chuckle, or you may be glad your kids are grown, but this is what works for us.


FAMILY RULES
1) You will treat us and each other with respect at all times
2) You will do your chores and any additional chores requested of you by either parent. Also you are a team so if your siblings need help - help them instead of telling on them - it may not be "your job" but you are a team and if one of you goes down you all go down.
3) You will do your best in school, it is your job
4) You are not required to participate in sports or other activities but if you do you will not quit during the season because you are too tired, your feelings are hurt or you didn't get the position you wanted. You made a commitment to the team and you will honor it.
5) Cars, cell phones, Video games are a luxury, not a necessity. If you choose not to do your chores or study hard in school you may loose one or all of them.
6) Rules for the cars - in order to enjoy the freedom of your car you will need to maintain a report card where the lowest grade it a C - don't even ask about a high D - the car will not be moving until the next report card where we see improvement.
7) We love you, if you don't like any of these rules feel free to change them in a house that you pay the mortgage on.
8) If at any time you are not able to drive, call us for whatever reason and we promise not to jump you about it until after 8 am the next day
9) If you should ever be arrested for doing something dumb, call us and let us know where you are but don't expect us to bail you out - you did the crime, do the time.

I know that several of you will not agree and that is fine, I am not asking you too. I myself am just sick and tired of people whining about how their children behave and the doing nothing to correct the problem because they are afraid that the kids will no longer "like them". I know that on any given day only about half my children "like me" and I a fine with that, they don't have to love me, although that would hurt a little but I am not supposed to be there best friend, I am their parent, no matter how much of a pain in the arse that may be. I truly do love my children and that is why I expect what I do from them, so when they are older and out on their own they hopefully will understand why we held them accountable.