I am not sure if this has ever happened to you, but have you ever made such a big deal out of something hoping to garner interest from your family only to be really, really let down in the end? And then when you are that let down you are so hurt that you end up becoming frustrated and angry? Well, welcome to Valentines Day 2010 in our household. I guess today I am using this page as my vent, maybe just for the simple reason that it is Wednesday and I am still nursing my wounds, which normally isn't like me but I can't seem to let it go. It wasn't any one little thing but a series of things which may have been let go but my husband had to go and step in it all over again last night.
To let you know how things operate in this house, my husband can be sort of an ostrich about things(you may know the type, head in the sand oblivious to the world around him), and sadly enough even when the writing is on the wall. My birthday is the day before his, yet for the last three years he has forgotten it completely until something has happened to jolt his memory, normally it is a bat shit crazy wife screaming at him about feelings and being appreciated because I tend to get mildly annoyed. Birthday 2009 and 11 pm he wanted to know why I was still up, so I asked him if he forgot anything that day. Of course being a man he said no, so when I pointed out it had been my birthday all day and he hadn't said anything he said that there were still 30 minutes in the day and he was waiting until 11:59. Whatever. This year the kids made a point to make sure he knew it was my birthday, my 39th birthday, a day before his 40th birthday. It was talked about often. The night before my birthday my 11 year old son brought me his gift, wrapped and all and when my hubby watched me open the present. No comment. The next day while we were watching TV I got a phone call from his ex wife. He wanted to know why she was calling me. I told him because "it is my birthday you dumb arse!" Nothing, just a blank stare. Later that evening when he felt it was safe to come into the same room as me he explained that he never knows what day it is and that I need to remind him in advance so he can be prepared. Mental note - make sure you remind hubby daily when you want something done, I can do that even if it is a little like baby sitting.
Fast forward now to February, 3 weeks after the birthday blow up. I remind him on and off for several days. The night before I give him my present which was an album of the kids and I along with all the reasons we love him. I give it to him the night before as he has to leave for work on Sunday by 6 am thinking this will remind him without me being too pushy. He gets home from work - nothing, not a dang thing. I should add I wasn't asking for a gift or flowers, just a card that he actually had to go and get from the store. Nothing, nothing, Nada, well, I take that back, there may have been some tears and some type of cussing on my part. Kids scattering, even they had got me a card.
Last night my husband came home from work with a gift for me, since he could see I was still seething a little. It was a cute little bag of chocolate covered pretzels, which I thought was nice until he told me they were a re gift from one of the stores he works with. Apparently even the stores he contracts with give him valentines! The man is lucky I love him, today I may not really like him, but I will always love my ostrich.
On a side note the card from the kids was really cute and they had all signed it. I asked the 11 year old where he got the money for a card. This was his response "I was so lucky mom, I found it in the bottom drawer of the buffet, and Mom there are tons of cards in there already signed and everything all you do is pick out the one you need!" Yep, even he re gifted a card. In his defense he did not know that was my keepsake drawer, the thought was sweet even if he is the next generation re gifter!
So, in conclusion, venting is good. In a way, when I look back now there was some humor in the day, even if it didn't go the way I wanted I know I am loved. And that my friends was the rest of the story.....for now.
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